Why do cape verdeans think certain things are worse than they really are and the are so quick 2 judge. Like, we will forever act like aids is a death sentence and talk about anyone who has it and make them feel guilty. And if someone is involved in gangs and drugs we act like they're the worst people on earth.

Why is it they feel women shouldn't hang out with boys or should act a certain way; and if you're a lady and not scared to express yourself your a 'puta" or a "arguen botadu". Why is that? These Cape Verdean parents need to realize we aint in Cape Verde any more. We are in America.

Because many of us are ignorant and closed minded. But worst, many of us are afraid to accept what's not traditional, to embrace or live along with diversity of thoughts and difference of opinions and life style without pointing fingers. And that's why we have so much generational crisis among our people.

My brothers and sisters, it's time to move on and acept the age of enlightment or we will find ourselves lost in the train of changes.

Progress, Progress, Progress: this is what America and people that live here is all about.

I guess one of the answers would be that they're just trying to transmit what they think are better values. Indeed how can one likens gang life, prostitution, drug dealing, street life and "thuggery", to progress?

I guess they see kids droping out of schools, compromising their future and they try to prevent those kids from being thugs by giving them what they think are good advices, by cajoling them, things you'll most probably do with your own kids when you'll be able to reason as a parent and not as a rebel.

And by the way, don't get things mixed up: Progress does not mean street life, drug dealing, etc. It means improvement, advancement of the human being and last time I checked that kind of life you seem to preach is a backward step.
Deus fica ku bo.
Lu

I agree with Lu. This things that happens have some to do with concept of values!

Everybody wants success for themselves and their loved ones. The question is how can you help somebody be successful. Kids even when they don't seem to care about what is important, they want to be successful in life.

Again the question remains, how to be successful!

Our own concept of values.

Our immigrant parents had the life that they had, with that, they created their own notion of right and wrong as well as how they can do to become successful. In Cape verde you know is work work and work. There is nothing wrong with working but when it is only working than it is wrong. Many parents do not spend quality time with their kids, hoping that because they are working so hard will do it. Wrong!

We know that society in Cape Verde is "Machista" and men are allowed to do anything they want, and it is ok, while women are expected to behave certain way (shy, not express herself, female manners, listen more than say, do not have boyfriend untill the age of marriage, etc,) Man who are considered successful are the ones who had at least more than one girlfriend, drink, rebelious, etc.

What a contradiction, ah!

I do not want to generalize because things have changed alot the other way around, but older people still keep this current.

Kids on the other end came to this country early or were born here and got in touch with new values, new culture that does not mean everything is best, but that reinforce the idea of self-sufficiency, independency, indvidualism, and those are prohibited words for kids in the old country.

While you have young kids you're ok as a parent, but as soon as you get into the adolescent years, your fight got started.

Fight doesn't have to be open. As Psichologist Freud said, you can fight against yourself or you can express it against others. What it is evident is that in some way kids tend to go agains the old notion of values of their parents, and in many cases they harm themselves by doing what is absolutely wrong.

But, as parents we need to be more connected with our kids, support them in times of frustrations because they have their own frustrations everyday just like when we go to work. At the same time we need to learn the limits and set them for our kids. If we don't do that early enough, it is a signature for divorce with our kids when they grow.

I think parents need to teach their kids and learn with their kids, because many parents because of language barriers do not have many alternatives to catch up to integrate and interact with the new world as quick as their kids do.

cabrala

We are becomming a society of apologetics. I do not apologize for the behavior of other people. iI given the opportunity to conform to societal norms and they choose not to, then we should just let them be. So what were Cape Verdeans or anyone else fed for 500 years, Salah?

Anonim.
AIDS IS a death sentence! Where have you been??
Being involved with gangs IS a death sentence because
you may be killed by others, as we have seen in our
community. Accepting these things is not PROGRESS.
It's unfortunate that we equate being American
or being "modern" with risky behavior that lead
to poverty and to health and mental illness.
Why don't we look at Americans who are living well
as a sign of progress? Do not try to normalize this.
As far as girls are concerned, they don't have to do
what these boys are doing in order to feel they are equal
to them. So, please, don't minimize being infected with AIDS
or being involved in drugs and gangs. Only a minority lives
like this.

I DON'T
YOU DON'T
HE DOESN'T

but

THEY DO